REX RONAN: EXPERIMENTAL SURGEON Version 1.00 By Lil Randy ----------------- TABLE OF CONTENTS ----------------- 1. Version History 2. Introduction 3. Story 4. Controls 5. Items 6. Enemies 7. Walkthrough - Mouth - Trachea - Lungs - Bronchial Tubes - Lungs II - Artery - Heart - Artery II - Brain 8. Final Thoughts - Sequel? - VC Worthy? 9. About the Author 10. Legal Notes --------------- VERSION HISTORY --------------- 1.00: I'm assuming this will be the only one. This is frickin' Rex Ronan, not World of Warcraft. It's not that long... But this is where I get the main point across. ------------ INTRODUCTION ------------ WHAT THE HELL IS THIS, AND WHY AM I PLAYING IT? That's what ran through my mind the whole time I played this game. Yes, this is one of those god-awful Raya Systems educational games that was coming out for the SNES every two seconds that were overpriced and nobody bought them but stupid kids and soccer moms. But here's the best part about this game: You can turn the education OFF. Marvel concept. Raya did something right for once! Even then, the only source of education is in the "smart bombs" scattered throughout the action levels. As I played this game, I noticed that it suffered from "one more level" syndrome. Yes, this game sucks almost complete and total ass when reviewed by the average player, but I liked it more and more with each passing level. Who knows why. Maybe it was the ridiculous concept that cigarettes are full of nanomachines that want to eat your organs from the inside out. Maybe it was the strange idea of preventing a heart attack as a boss fight. Maybe it was the fact that you're tearing through somebody's body, cleaning up cancer in style with a FLAMETHROWER. It does have it's weak points. Hit detection... You either love it or hate it. The tip of the flame is what causes damage, but enemies only hurt you if they pass all the way through Rex. You can just barely get by a crowd of enemies with no damage if you jump at the last second. Either way, I loved it. Maybe you will too? Enough preaching! Let's get on with this thing already. Oh, and for the record, this is the only "Fantastic Voyage" sort of thing where there's no "Hurr we have to leave through his/her poopy lolz" joke. ----- STORY ----- "NO SUDDEN MOVEMENTS JAKE, OR YOU COULD KNOCK REX ON HIS KIESTER!" Ok, yeah. I don't care if it's the 90's or not. My grandparents don't say kiester. And my family is from Europe. Let's remember that, ok Raya? Alright then. Glad we covered that. So... Jake Westboro is basically the mascot for the Blackburn Tobacco Company. He's got a beautiful wife, a big family, a nice house, blah blah blah, typical 90's dream life. All because he runs around telling people to smoke. Wish I could get that kind of money for doing something so simple. But see folks, it's never that simple. The guy has been doing this since he was 15, and he's brainwashed himself into thinking that smoking is the greatest thing since sliced bread. And he's been smoking like 8944848 packs a day, chewing his weight in snuff, beating his wife, blah blah blah... OMFG HE'S DYING. Hey, what do you think caused that? I thought this guy was living the life? Dreaming the dream? Now he's dying? I DON'T WANNA BE RICH ANYMORE, MOMMY! What is Jake going to do? Who will save him, and how? HELP ME, ELITE BEAT AGENTS!!! Enter Dr. Rex Ronan, experimental surgeon. ...Hear that, ladies? Experimental. Rawrrr. Our old buddy Rex has come up with a novel idea. Arming himself with a flamethrower and a ship that looks remarkably similar to the one that took down the Death Star (Making crappy games AND copyright infringement? Curse you, Raya Systems! Does your treachary know no bounds?!) Rex shrinks himself down to near-microscopic size and enters Jake's body, ready to save the day. In the immortal words of Miss Frizzle; seatbelts, everyone! We're going on a field trip to all the places cigarettes harm. But this isn't going to be like your average episode of the Magic School Bus. Walking around cleaning up cigarette muck? That's boring! Hell, even Fantastic Voyage has a fight scene! ...What's this? Breaking news! DEADLY MICROBOTS FROM BLACKBURN TOBACCO COMPANY HAVE ENTERED JAKE'S BODY! USE CAUTION! Hey, that's more like it! Suit up, boys and girls! We're off to learn AND kick ass! -------- CONTROLS -------- ***************** - Action Stages - ***************** D-PAD: You move around with this. I never would have guessed! B BUTTON: You jump... No, this is ACTION! You flip through the air with such grace that ninjas bow down to you! Y BUTTON: Ninja kick! Hi-ya! No, seriously. It's slow and it sucks. I never use it. X BUTTON: Flying Dragon kick! Ho-yo! Ah, this is just as bad. At least it's faster. A BUTTON: Here's where the action happens. Hold this to use your weapons. Aim with the D-Pad. ***************** - Flying Stages - ***************** D-PAD: Move the ship. Up goes up and down goes down. Left goes left and right pays me $200... I mean goes right. Man that joke was horrible. A/B/X/Y BUTTONS: Fire the "Laser". Kudos to whoever gets that. PSSHEW SHOOM ZOOM ZOOM ZAP! ----- ITEMS ----- RED MOLECULE: Restores ammo. BLUE MOLECULE: Restores health. GREEN MOLECULE: 1-up PURPLE MOLECULE: Switch between flamethrower and blaster. Flamethrower is good for cleaning, and blaster is good for kicking ass. Don't ever try to clean with the blaster. It's HARD. YELLOW MOLECULE: Weapon power up. It goes Blue-->Green-->Yellow-->Orange-->Red. The strength lasts for the stage, but it doesn't carry over to the next stage. SMART BOMBS: Ha, ha. Real funny. Shoot these with your guns to get some kind of stupid question like "Do cigarettes kill?" or a statement like "cigarettes make your food taste better." Touch it if it's true to kill all enemies (except ships...) or ignore it if it's false. Touching a false answer cuts your life in half. ------- ENEMIES ------- BALL: It swirls around, Occasionally fires a ring. Fine by itself, but BRUTAL in packs. ROBO-WALKER: The only "Microbot" that looks like a bot. It fires a small ray off the top of it's head. Shoot the body to damage it, hitting the wheels do nothing. SATILITE: It's a little known fact that Jake gets 5000 channels in his body. This annoying enemy can tear you apart in seconds with it's giant laser beam. Duck to dodge the beam and fire away. SHIP: I guess this is some sort of boss? They wait for you at the end of the level, and you have to kill them to move on. Their machine guns are some of the most irritating weapons I've ever seen on an enemy in a video game. ----------- WALKTHROUGH ----------- FINALLY! LETS GET THIS OVER WITH. ********* - MOUTH - ********* Ok, Rex got in his ship just to get out and send it away? I think cigarettes damaged this guy in more ways than we think. I mean, look at all the frickin' teeth he's got! You're basically cleaning up his bad breath here, as well as scrubbing his teeth. You can use the teeth as platforms as well as walk across his gums. The tongue moves up and down, you can walk on it to get to items in the mouth you may have missed. At the back of the throat you fight a single ship, only to have your ship pick you up and take you away. *********** - TRACHEA - *********** Whee! We're flying at light speed down the throat. When you get the mucus blockages, fly through the biggest hole as far out as you can to avoid damage. Eventually they start rotating. Hold down any button and stay towards the lower right after you pass all the mucus to avoid damage. When the paths start to break off, it doesn't matter where you go, just stay close to the lower right. As the tunnel gets darker, you get closer to the lungs, until... ********* - LUNGS - ********* These don't look like lungs. "Photorealistic organs" my ass haha. Either way, you're deep into Jake's body now, so you're scrubbin' and bubblin' your way through pre-cancer cells and lots and lots of icky tar. It's also a big maze in here, keep an eye on your map. Eventually, you will reach the last tunnel, and after dealing with a ship it's off to... ******************* - BRONCHIAL TUBES - ******************* Back to the ship! After dealing with more mucus you head through branching paths again, but once again it does not matter. Stay to the lower right and fire your way through the blobs like last time, and eventually you'll make it out alive. ************ - LUNGS II - ************ Whoa. Ok, these look like lungs. This lung is inflamed, AKA this is a big, long level full of tar and pre-cancer cells. It's also got lots of damage in it so there's plenty of holes you can glitch jump your way through to painlessly avoid enemies and get to the end faster. This time you have to deal with TWO ships! And a satilite. Yeah, it's a pain. But clear that mess up and we're off to hitch a ride to the heart on an... ********** - ARTERY - ********** Whee! Somebody's been hitting McDonalds a lot, because there's an almost never-ending set of fatty deposits you have to squeeze your way through as you blast down germs that never seem to give you a break. There's no safe spot you can stay in here, so grin and bear it. Never let off of those lasers for a moment as you pray the next tunnel you fly through leads to the... ********* - HEART - ********* You wanna talk about open-ended levels, here it is. After you pass through the second "valve" you get dropped into the pit of no return. Never fear! Believe it or not, head up towards the left and start climbing your way up the heart until you reach the last valve. There, a blood clot threatens to kill Jake, (Remind me, why wasn't this a problem while we were busy cleaning up his lungs?) so hopefully you don't have the blaster upgrade when you get to it, because if you have the blaster the clot is going to regenerate WAY TOO FAST for you to destroy with the tiny blaster shots. You also have to deal with a whole squadron of those damn ships during this already irritating "boss", but press on, Doctor! After you destroy the clot you only have to worry about whatever ship is left, they stop comming back. After you've taken care of the clot and the ships, head through the newly cleaned valve and into the artery. *REMEMBER*: Jake's life is your life. If "HEART ATTACK ALERT!" starts to flash on the screen you better clean that valve like you've never cleaned before. If the clot makes a solid wall, you will have to restart the level, regardless of how many lives you have. ************* - ARTERY II - ************* Damn. Wait, what? DAMN! If you thought the last artery was unforgiving get ready for one HELL of a ride. The germs are literally endless and the fatty deposits will finish you off long before you make it to the brain. And it's a long ride, too. Hang in there! Hopefully you'll have lots of lives to spare, because this artery spares NOTHING. Eventually, the fearless Rex Ronan will make it to the... ********* - BRAIN - ********* If the lungs were a maze, this is a fricking fortress. This level is one big boss battle, everywhere you look you'll be scrubbing away Jake's regenerating nictotine addiction. Eventually, and I mean eventually (this is a LONG level) you will reach a cliff of damaged nerves/arteries with a whole stash of power ups, health and ammo. Seriously. One big line of power ups to guarantee you have a red flame by the end, and if you have the blaster make sure to grab the flamethrower power up, otherwise jump over it. When you make it to the dead end, you see one giant mass... The final addiction. There's three or four ships here that aren't too happy with what you've done, but Rex isn't about to give up yet! The red flame will make short work of the ships and even shorter of the addiction. When it's gone, finish off any ships still floating around and Rex will hop into his ship one last time. ------------------- ENDING -------------------- Rex flies out through the ear and is grown back to normal size. Huzzah! Jake is alive and well and tells people that smoking is bad, and somehow single-handedly overthrows the Blackburn Tobacco Company. Yeah, that's a nice way to treat the company that make you fithy stinkin' rich! Speaking of riches, Rex gets all sorts of funding for perfecting his micro-surgery techniques, blah blah blah it's a happily ever after ending. Rex continues to save lives and Jake goes back to beating his wife, but without the annoying interuption of a smoker's cough! -------------- FINAL THOUGHTS -------------- Huh. That was one heck of a game, wasn't it? Now, I'm sure it could have been longer or something but I'm thinking that there's not really a lot of "Fantastic Voyage" themed games out there. Sure, there's "Blood and Guts" and then the actual "Fantastic Voyage" for Atari but... hmm. But hey, somebody's trying to start something! A recent PC game called "ReMission" is all about causing havoc in somebody's body to cure diseases, and it's got frickin' rocket launchers! :D *********** - SEQUEL? - *********** Somebody's thinking about it. And I don't think Nintendo hated this game too much, it was the Super Mario Sunshine of it's time! Don't deny it... Think about it. Rex Ronan wore a cleaning device on his back long before our favorite plumber did so it had to have gone through somebody's mind at Nintendo. They've also been joking around about it more in their magazine and on the website, so hmm, you know? Hmm. Personally, I think if somebody made this into a franchise, as long as they went sans education and you know, sucked less, I think it would do just fine. Haha... Maybe this is the long lost franchise Nintendo has been talking about it? You know they're capable of pulling these kinds of stunts, so you never know... ************** - VC WORTHY? - ************** As a proud Wii owner and a regular shopper of the Virtual Console, it got me thinking: With all these "forgotten titles" Nintendo wants to resurface on the Wii's VC, could long lost hero Rex Ronan show up under the SNES catagory? At the very least, make him a AT Trophy in Super Smash Brothers Brawl... ---------------- ABOUT THE AUTHOR ---------------- Name: Randy Dearing GFAQS: Lil Randy This isn't my first guide I've written. A few years back I had some lying around, finished and ready to go but sadly my house burned down on christmas day three years back and I couldn't upload any. Other guides I have in the works are... RATCHET AND CLANK 3: UP YOUR ARSENAL (PS2) ALIEN HOMINID (PS2) RAYMAN RAVING RABBIDS (Wii) NINJA GAIDEN (NES/VC) WONDER BOY IN MONSTER WORLD (GENESIS/VC) ----------- LEGAL NOTES ----------- This guide can be posted at the following sites: www.gamefaqs.com www.gamespot.com www.ign.com Keep in mind that no matter how much of a crappy guide this is, it's still MY guide and therefore stealing it can get you punished under copyright laws. Copyright 2007 Randy "Lil Randy" Dearing